A new week

Well, we survived the first week back to "normal" life. Tomorrow will be the two-week anniversary of Baby Blair's death. There should be no more "firsts." I've worked a week. Boy Wonder is back at work. Alli has been out in the real world a few times. Overall, she's looking and feeling much better. She brought Elvis to my school to join my class in a fun art project. She took him to his therapy appointments and that went well. She's getting ready to go back to work. I don't want to jinx us and I know there will still be rough days ahead, but I do feel like we are on an upswing right now. I'm so glad!

There are a few difficult things I still have to deal with. I'm calling Cori's case worker tomorrow and giving her my 10-day notice that I need her moved. She's a scary, scary child and I'm uncomfortable having her here. I don't even want to see her any more. She needs to be somewhere else. I feel so guilty for feeling this way but I've got all I can handle. I just can't keep dealing with her bizarre thoughts and actions. It's all I can do to hold myself together some days. Every time I think I'm moving in the right direction, she pulls another attention-getting stunt. Stick a fork in me, I'm done.

I also think I'm putting my foster home on-hold. Right now, I'd say I'm done fostering altogether. However, in a year, Beth will be graduating from high school and likely moving on. How can I say now that I wouldn't want to foster again in the future? Also, I'd like to keep my license current because if some of my former foster kids came back into custody (or more likely, the kids of my former foster kids come into custody) I might want to take them. I'd like to at least be contacted about them so I could decide. I'm planning to discuss my options with my licensing worker but I think I can do all the requirements to keep my license valid (complete training, submit paperwork, 1 licensing home visit) and just not accept any placements for a few months to a year.

As time and money allow, we're moving forward with some home improvment/remodeling projects. The list, so far, includes:

~ Turning Alli's room/a storage room/an unused dark room into a separate apartment. That end of the house is plenty big and has it's own entrance. Alli might want to rent it or, if she moves out with BW, I can rent it to someone else. The bathroom floor needs to be replaced due to a plumbing leak. I've got someone to work on it and he plans to start late next week or the week after. Other than the floor repair, it's just a matter of getting rid of clutter and junk.
~ Beth is taking an interior design class at school and wants to redecorate our kitchen. I have to agree it's one of the ugliest kitchens I've ever seen. It's just like it was when I bought the house almost 8 years ago - hideous teal floral wallpaper and even more hideous blue berber carpet. Why in the world someone would put any carpet in the kitchen is beyond me. (That blue berber was actually running through most of the house when I bought it. I've replaced it everywhere else. The time has come for the kitchen to be berber-free, too.) She wants to paint the walls yellow and the cabinets white. I think we can do that.
~ Updating a few plumbing fixtures. I swear most of the faucets were the ones installed when the house was built 41 years ago. They are forever needing washers replaced. I think it's time to upgrade to the washerless version and make my life a little less complicated. The faucet handle in the hall bathroom actually broke off a few weeks ago. The shower in that bathroom already doesn't work (zero water pressure). It's kind of like camping. I'm tired of feeling like we are roughing it. I don't think running water in all bathrooms is too much to ask. It is 2008, after all!