Saturday, January 24, 2009

Another first in my life as an adoptive parent

The girls grandmother died early this morning. Alli had told me she was sick last night and wanted to borrow my van to go see her at the hospital. I asked her if she was supposed to be up and around so soon after her surgery. She said probably not. I told her to text Beth (who was at work) and see if she wanted to go when she got off. Alli could go with me to pick up Beth and I could take them to the hospital and drop them at the door so Alli wouldn't have to park in the outer lot and walk all that way. She left to text Beth and I didn't hear anything else for a while. Then, for some reason, I felt like I should go ahead and take Alli now. I put my socks and shoes on and texted Alli to see if she still wanted to go. She said that she was in a lot of pain now and she'd just wait and go today. Beth got home from work and I asked if she wanted to go see her and she said she'd wait until today, too.

Beth texted me at 7:30 this morning. Beth is never up at 7:30 on a non-school day so I knew something was wrong. Her cousin had just texted her to tell her their grandmother had died early this morning. So, neither of my girls got to see her. I'm sure there will be some regret from both of them. That's just how life goes sometimes.

I haven't heard the service details yet, but I do plan to go. I can't miss school on Monday or Tuesday morning (district-mandated testing and I give part of the test to the first graders) but if the service is at any other time, I will be there. This grandmother wasn't always nice to my girls (she called one of them - Alli, I think - the devil and actually meant it). However we also know now she was struggling with Alzheimer's and was probably doing the best she could. She's still an important part of their childhoods and their history and they will want to honor that. I get along well with this part of their family and enjoy seeing them. I just wish it was under better circumstances.

1 comment:

momma-o-minnie said...

I'm not so sure Ali should still be in that much pain so far after her cerclage... I know I was only uncomfortable for 24 hours... If she continues to have pain, take her back in, please...